Here I am Pops, piss drunk and yet the loneliest I have ever felt. Its such an irony, I am paying for exactly the same thing, I am paying such a huge cost. I thought of messaging you, but I know just having your number doesn't mean I can. You should give me credit at least for knowing that bit even when I am sloshed. Here I am, thinking about you, every single day, I cannot call you, I cannot hear your voice.
Here you go Pops, thats the best punishment you could have ever given me. I am not saying this punishment isnt legitimate, I am just saying I hope you know for those 4 nights, I am being continuously punished, and its all worth it, because I did something very wrong to you.
You know what would be crazy though, that day when you call me, to tell me I am forgiven, the day I hear your voice. Crazy dream right? I know, don't tell me its impossible, in a way I know, I just don't have the guts to admit it. Let me live in my own dream, you shall stay mine forever.
All this I wanted to tell you, and yet I cannot. I use this lifeless blog as your pseudo so that I can tell you about my day everyday. What a life.
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